Monday, March 14, 2011

This morning, I was woken up by the cutest set of eyes staring at me. Immediately, I bounced out of the dream I was in the middle of and smiled back at the round face smiling at me.

One of the best ways to wake up these days.

At the same time, as the day has progressed, the frames of the dream I was in the middle of have been running through my head. At first, I kept thinking how strange the dream seemed to be. Then I thought some more about it and the more I scanned, the more I realized what was happening. It was my life. My thoughts. Fears. Desires. Confusion and the such. While in the dream, I felt as if I was being pulled in every direction and I couldn't decide. It was as if each angle was saying 'This way. You want this' and at those moments another option would rear it's head and I would be convinced to stare in that direction. I was woken up just as I was seeing what I keep thinking is the life I have (or supposed to have) left behind. I felt myself walking in so many directions. Trying to be so many things to both myself and other people.

What am I to take from this? Is it just supposed to be a visual representation of all the crap running through my head on a daily basis?

As of yet, this is where it has left me. Alone.

I feel like a fly traveling around a ribbon of fly paper trying to stick to some part of it but not having the connection when I attempt to land anywhere. Part of me is sad that I can't seem to land but there is still a part of me happy that I have the opportunity to work on finding that connection. The connection with what, I have no idea. A person. A job. An idea, even.

Insert confusion here.


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